It’s very emotional when things start to change. You can feel happy, mad, sad, frustrated and at a loss. It’s like when you want to jump into something new and find your direction. You have all these things going on in your head and can’t seem to find which way to go. It’s frustrating and over whelming! Than I start to think, if I could just pin point exactly what it is I have a passion for and devote most my time to; I got it!
I wish it were that easy. When you have obligations and real life stuff to take care of, it’s not just a matter of 1,2,3. Than again it wouldn’t be that easy even if I was single, with barely any bills and a decent amount money. Anything worth trying is going to take change and commitment. It is going to take hard work and dedication. It is going to take trying something new and not holding back to make it to that destination.
I realized that I had to make a decision to jump or be safe. I realized that you either don’t have faith or you do. I realized that you work your but off or you just don’t! I realized that trying something new is an amazing experience, that you take with you in your life. The very thing that you try, just might be what you become for the rest of your life!
Everyday I have to take care of my priorities, before I take care of myself. I am a mother of three boys, I have cars and bills that need to be paid on time. I am someone who has to do it, even if I don’t want to do it.
For example, staying at a job that I don’t want to do anymore, but I have no choice. There is no one that can pick up the weight to relieve me. I’m ok with that, but what I’m not ok with; is doing it for the rest of my life. I refuse to live from pay check to pay check and not have a home. I refuse to sit here and settle for less and be stuck at a job that will never satisfy me. I refuse to let this world dictate my situation just because I had my first son at eighteen years old. I refuse to quit! I refuse to say it’s ok that other people can become successful, but I can’t!
No, I can! I will work it out to where I can switch to a job that will allow me to work towards my future. I will get a home for my boys by the time I’m 30 because they deserve it. My husband and I will travel the world when we get older and not have to worry about money. I refuse to believe any less! I refuse to let situations in life take my joy and my progress away from me! I refuse to let the things that people say stop me from moving forward, because one day I will be giving them part of that dream come true! They will have nothing left to say at that moment, but I refuse to boast! I will continue to stay humble and trust in God! I refuse to die and leave no legacy behind for the ones I love!
Watch me make this happen, because I refuse not to!